This topic is perhaps the least popular subject to talk about. There is a “slap in the face” effect whenever this topic arises. I realized that this topic is exactly what our ego becomes reactive to! The more we feel edgy about it, the more we really need to look into ourselves deeply. If we remain unperturbed, we are probably ready for this! If we are serious spiritual aspirants on a quest for higher level of consciousness, this subject is exactly what you need to hear and integrate into your being to level up in your growth. If we are not able to face this topic and not willing to hear it, we are definitely going to take a longer route in our spiritual journey. However, if you are serious in this narrow path, sit back and relax and let all the information sink in for the next level of consciousness.

Ego exists in everyone on earth and there is no one who can say that they are without it. Ego comes with this physical 3D vehicle as part of its make up. We have the physical embodiment which our ego predominates. And we have our 4D/5D or even 6D-12D and beyond in the astral and etheric energetic form. Now that our topic is on ego, we shall just focus on this somewhat easy to talk about, but difficult to understand concept. In the spiritual community, we may hear people say that “oh, after my dark night of the soul, my ego was dead already” or “i no longer have ego”. But you know what? Technically, ego is part of us and remains in us during our course of lifetime on this earth plane. 

Whilst it’s inaccurate to say that, ego is dead. It is imperative to transcend beyond our ego so that it can be less reactive and be trusting to follow our True Self’s direction, which is always aligned with the divine. We can then ask the ego to take the passenger’s seat instead of always being in the driver’s seat and be in control. How many times we had reacted even before we realized it? For example, someone said something that triggered us, and the next thing we knew, we engaged in a high surge of emotional outburst of anger and ended up quarreling with that person. Only after the matter rested, we began to wonder what actually happened? Why did I react in that negative way? How come I just cannot remain calm? The truth of the matter is, when we allowed our ego to always take over, we actually gave it strength to continue to behave in that certain way. It’s like going to the gym and doing training because you will only get big muscles through repetition and there is no other way around it, right? This is just pure science! 

So, in order to break the cycle, it will be a conscious effort to take action and be responsible in our thoughts and actions. We got to slow ourselves down by pondering over events which took place instead of letting it slide. When we reflect on the situation and decide to make a change, we are allowing our ego to trust the True Self by not reacting in the usual way whenever triggered. Whilst ego is normally associated with anger, it is actually much more than that. When we are not clear and do not do the hard work of reflection, I mean truly reflect by thinking about what happened and having the intention to improve oneself, we remain stuck in a place of inertia. Not improving spiritually, having to go through repeated lessons over and over again without even realizing that we are drawing these lessons to ourselves! Lessons are continuously drawn to us for soul growth and there is no escaping due to universal laws. As we begin to be doing the introspective work, we are able to recognise and discern whether that situation is truly for our highest good or just the ego behind the scene, crepting in to make a decision which is seemingly positive but ended up having a selfish reason behind the action. There is nothing wrong with the ego for doing its job sometimes by protecting us. However, we have to understand the nature of the ego. Ego is synonymous with being a little child who seeks attention and reward. It is ignorant of what the True Self is and is always afraid of not knowing! 

There is always a conflict between our ego which belongs to the 3D physical plane of existence and our True Self which is the true expression of our soul essence that some called it Higher Self or Oversoul. Contemplative reflections will be necessary to help us recognise our true intention and motivation behind our every action. We are also able to break destructive cycles of repeated lessons after we understand the meaning behind them and use our free will to choose the right remedy to counter those destructive patterns. 

When we are truly serious about our spiritual growth, it is important to catch ourselves and recognise whether it is our ego that is interfering. It is easy to recognise when it is blatantly obvious, in the case of anger. However, the difficult ones are those that are mixed in with good intentions. For example, when you are trying to help someone by offering your time and effort in listening to their woes and sorrows. When we are unappreciated and either was chided or taken for granted, what happens? We get upset and possibly angry right? And the arrow was pointed to the person who is unappreciative and downright negative. How many of you questioned your own behavior? Why did we even get upset and angry over doing something good for someone if it is truly out of good intention? This is clear cut  ego being upset. Because our True Self who is divinely connected will never get upset even when taken advantage of because it was done out of unconditional love. If it’s unconditional it means that that person does not deserve it and there are no ties or strings attached to the outcome. There is no need for appreciation or good remarks because it was unconditional! However, we will get upset and feel unappreciated when it is conditional. So, the love needs to be reciprocated by having some sort of positive feedback. This type of love is called conditioned love. Or you may call it selfish love! Not unless we understand our own motivation and action behind it, we might never truly see this point and go on doing the wrong things and never ever realizing it! Or when we feel mistreated and unappreciated, we are identified with our ego. But know this, we are not our ego. We will feel mistreated when we are identified with the ego because if we are aligned instead with our True Self, we will not feel this way since we are secured and there is no doubt about who we are. We are not ego and why would we get upset with anyone saying something which is not true, right? So, this is the subtle part where a lot of people do not recognise. You will never see this, unless you do the inner work by introspection, not just on a regular basis. But in fact on a daily basis. 

Now, the next thing you will say is, you are just a normal human being and not God. So, it’s difficult to give unconditional love because it’s only meant for people like Yeshua or Buddha. But think about it for a moment. All that was expounded about them were not meant to be admired and kept in our hearts. It was meant to be shared to us and for us to put to practice to reach our own spiritual breakthroughs! When we are able to slowly but surely recognise the subtle nuances of our ego and train our ego, we move towards Self-Mastery and will behave in our own best version. Responding in accordance with unconditional love and wisdom. Start doing self-inquiry or self-reflection daily. Ponder what you have not done each day to bless or make another person’s day! Can we pass by a stranger and send a prayer or goodwill thought to that person if you see that the person needs it? For eg., whenever we see a handicap or old person with some sort of disability, what do most people do? They saw them and just passed by without doing anything, right? But here you are, can you send a goodwill thought to bless that person? You can, right? This person is unrelated to you. This person technically does not deserve it from you because you do not know each other. So, if you are going to do something out of goodwill for that person, is not this unconditional love? Or you say good morning to people whom you do not know, isn’t it already unconditional love because it was done out of no obligation, right? We can do this, isn’t it? Let’s start to be more conscious of our thoughts and actions, transcending and helping our ego to move up the ladder! Let’s also start to spread positivity and help all of us collectively to break beyond the illusionary 3D egoic hold on us so that we can truly see much more clearly on a higher perspective of the true reality. There will be transformation and our soul will level up in our spiritual journey.